Saturday, December 17, 2011

Adventure Bowl
Ask A Guy Out On A Date


Yes, it sometimes seems as if the blogs have grown more infrequent as life is whipping past me at such a frantic pace. There always seems so much to do. Right now, in so certain order I must: do all my Christmas shopping, find a place to board my dog, fret over how much that is going to cost, get an Ambien for the plane ride home, clean my entire apartment, get my life fully organized and lose 20 pounds. But even in all the stress, I always think of this place as a place of solace and one I've missed very much.

I can feel a lot of things are changing... all for the good. It might be that sense of optimism that comes as a calendar year draws to a close and we can metaphorically feel like we can wipe the slate clean. I always feel like we can start over at any time... but I'm feeling it more so recently. I want to tell you about an adventure I pulled out of the bowl about a month ago... and one, I hope I am not being overdramatic, but I think might change my life...

So the bowl, you know, is filled with tons of adventures, lots of things written on little folded up pieces of paper. I try to pull one a week and force myself out of life's little ruts. It's a way to put a smile on my face as I do something offbeat and unexpected. It was over 6 months ago that I put "Ask A Guy On A Date" in the bowl after I had had some luck with that same adventure in New York City.

So a month ago, I pulled this same adventure. Instead of running around town looking high and low for someone to ask out... getting too shy or too scared to do it -- I did what had worked in NY: I took an ad out on Craigslist.

"Fun Girl Looking For Fun Guy For Happy Hour Drinks" the ad said. It seemed innocent enough. I had no plans that night and was just looking for someone cool, that was up for an adventure. If he was tall... or cute... that was a plus. Smart and funny? Another plus but not insisted upon. It was Craigslist after all, so mostly, I was looking for someone who would not kill me.

I was surprised to receive, in my inbox, the most shocking outpouring of pictures of male genitalia that I have ever seen. Perhaps, as I had put in my ad the last time I had done this, I should have cautioned, "Please do not send me a picture of your penis, as I already know what one looks like."

I was kind of taken aback... this was in the "Women for Men" section... certainly if I was looking for the sort of thing where a picture of someone's naked-osity was a prerequisite, wouldn't I have placed my ad somewhere else???? I pondered this, as I drove to 7-11 for a bottle of screw top wine. Only some cheap Chardonnay was going to take the sting out of this night.

It did. I settled into bed bummed this adventure had not gone the way I had hoped. Then... at 9:45pm, I received an email... from a gentleman... who was fully clothed. He was funny... he wore glasses... so perhaps he was smart, too. His smile was friendly and he used many exclamation points which made me thinking he was either mildly retarded or an optimist... Hmmm....

I certainly was not going out with a stranger after 10pm... and certainly not half in the bag on cheap Chardonnay. I had deleted all the other sinister emails I had gotten but kept coming back to this one. "He can't be normal. There must be something wrong with him. He is kind of cute though. He does have a beautiful smile... No... don't email back. He might murder you."

So I didn't.

Until the next afternoon. Was I really going to stay in tonight (AND EVERY OTHER NIGHT OF MY LIFE, ONLY TO DIE ALONE WITH 100 CATS???????). Or should I take a chance... be adventurous and email this guy?

So I did. I said he seemed fun and cool and since he did the job I used to do, we'd probably have a lot in common... however, since I was quite hungover after a night of consoling myself with cheap white wine after looking at lots of male nut sacks... I wouldn't be able to go out tonight... maybe some other time?

He replied back right away. "Well, my Friday night just got a lot less interesting!" (Again, with the !!!!!). But this time it charmed me... maybe he was... an optimist. Maybe he was a happy person... and being sincere. Those were all good things. And when he said he understood and when he said, "Maybe we'll meet another time," I got scared that maybe we wouldn't.

Because if he was all these good things, then he had as much chance of staying single in a big city as a roast chicken dinner has a chance of not being devoured if I turn my back on my pug for 2.5 seconds.

None.

So I emailed back... well, I was going to sweat out my hangover at the gym and certainly, if I was going to do that, I could go out for one drink. Would he meet in my neighborhood?

Yes, he would!!!! (!!!!)

But you'll have to wait until next time when I tell you the story of a gorgeous, super funny, incredible smart, tall, blue eyed stranger met me out for drinks.

And all about how I have learned a lesson or two in taking chances, being optimistic, the importance of exclamation points and seizing the moment.

I promise... it's a good story ;)

(Jan. 7: Update - TONIGHT ;)  Thanks for all your amazing comments! They mean so much to me!)

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