Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Pre Mature Champagne-U-lation

I like to make up words. My favorites were "Stressful-itis" and "Overwhelmed-ness" as in, "I've come down with a horrible case of stressful-itis due to the overwhelmed-ness I'm feeling at work. I read on this girl's blog, 100 days in bed that, in order to recover, I must immediately get under the covers with two old fashioned donuts."

But my new favorite word is "Pre Mature Champagne-U-Lation." That's when your friends pop champagne for you and you celebrate some good news and then the good news goes away. See, it's like a play on pre mature ejaculation, but less disgusting and sad.

Anyway, my friends and I pre mature champagne-u-lated on a job I was told I got. "It's your job! You beat out all the candidates. You should drink mass quantities of quality champagne in order to celebrate!"

Ooo, and we did. Then this "job" has mysteriously not come to fruition and I have the embarassing task of every Wednesday night, when we have our Project Runway Party, of updating all the guests that ask, "Hey, what happened with that job of yours we were celebrating?"

I'm usually a CALM, COLLECTED GIRL, but I feel like if I am asked one more time about said, mysteriously disappearing job, I might just scream, "YOU GOT TO DRINK FORTY-FIVE DOLLAR CHAMPAGNE! ISN'T THAT ENOUGH???? MUST YOU KEEP BARRAGING ME WITH THESE QUESTIONS?????"

But quite frankly, I don't want to get kicked out of the Project Runway Party because it's like, the best thing I've got going for me. Plus, I imagine if I were to make such a scene, as the hostess was bouncing me and my pup out they door, she might just turn to me an say, "You owe me $45.00 for that champagne."