Thursday, December 13, 2007

Can You Die Of Humiliation???

So last night I'm at my weekly "Project Runway" Party where we all gather for dinner and wine and gossip and overall fashion cattiness. It has become the highlight of my week and as my friend R put it, "The weekend officially starts on Wednesdays." (Which for me, being unemployed, it could offcially start at 10:45am on a Monday... not that I'm bragging.)

Anyway, one of the beauties brought this gorgeous box of Christmas chocolates and it was passed around until it came to me in which the hostess swooped in and said, "NO CANDY FOR YOU, I'VE READ YOUR BLOG." At which point, I was really humiliated because for 1, don't really want my blog used againist me and 2, I know the blog IS OUT THERE FOR THE WORLD TO SEE, but some people there were strangers and I really don't want them knowing that I AM OBSESSED WITH MY FAT ASS.

The Hostess then metaphorically wagged her finger in front of me, letting me know, I, MYSELF, THE POSSESER OF SAID FAT ASS, had blogged about wishing my friends had said something to me while I was in my deepest depression and couldn't see for myself that my OWN ASS WAS GROWNING IT'S OWN ASS. To which I say, GO REREAD the entry, "OH, MY GOD, YOU'RE SO FAT, CONGRATULATIONS!"

Because I'm pretty sure for all it said, IT DID NOT SAY, YANK A BOX OF CHOCOLATES AWAY FROM ME and embarass me in front of strangers.

That said, those fancy chocolates weren't that good so I stole a Santa Hershey bar from one of Hostesses' kids and ate it on the way home.
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5 comments:

velcro said...

And that's why it is so much easier to be a dude. No dude is gonna tell another dude he can't have any of the chips/wings/deep fried whatever. Yeah I am worried about my buddy's ass getting too big...

Girls are mean!!

Tonya said...

I went to a party recently and had the opposite problem. I declined the birthday cake and the girl who brought it totally made a big scene about how she had gone all out of her way to bring it and that some girl is just going to decline it and how women need to be more accepting of their bodies...blah blah blah. I barely knew her or the people there, but needless to say I wanted to punch her in the face. :) Either way, it was very rude of your friend, and I'm glad you're pointing it out to her.

Mandy said...

I think there is a fine line between helping someone and embarrassing them - I would have cringed if a friend of mine had done that to me. Better option - if you know someone is trying to lose weight/get healthy, don't offer junk food. When I was trying to lose weight a few years ago, my mother changed her favourite recipes to use lower-fat ingredients so I didn't 'miss out'. A 'friend' of mine, however, insisted on cooking with full fat stuff and serving me big portions and getting mad when I either chose something else or only ate a bit.

Your friend could have chosen something else as snacks and therefore made it a healthier option. Or just not embarassed you at all.

adventure grrl said...

Hostess read this Blog and apologized profusely, eloquently and wonderfully. Though I am too afraid to ever eat in front of her or be in a bathing suit for fear she might mark up my fat pockets with a Sharpie, all is forgiven. (Unless she buys me a scale or a jump rope for my birthday.)

Dave said...

I'm not one to laugh at writing, but I did.