Two years ago, I had it all. An amazing job, a great boyfriend and a stable, wonderful family. Then my cousin died, my job went away, my boyfriend and I broke up and my Mom had a break down. This is my true story of how I went from having it all to having nothing at all. And this is my journey out - ONE FUN ADVENTURE at a time until I find my way back to me. 'Cause, after spending over 100 days in bed, I've realized, I don't want to live that way anymore.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
You Say You Want A REVOLUTION
I guess I should really have said, "resolution" because I want to give you an update on how I'm doing with mine (I originally posted them in "It's A Good Time To Make Lists!").
But the word "resolution" creeps me out because it's such a cliche J1 (January 1) thing to do and then bail on by F1. Besides, I want a REVOLUTION, not just a RESOLUTION. I want to be GROWING and CHANGING and CHALLENGING myself all year long.
My two year hibernation insists that I do.
So once a month, I'm going to throw out an Big Ol' Progress Report on my revolution:
1) I want PINK hair.
PROGRESS: Currently on a scale of mildly insane and bat shit crazy, I look majorly insane. See, when you get depressed, you forget about things like eating right, exercising or running a comb through your hair. It was sort of cool when my blonde highlights grew out because "peek-a-boo" roots were all the rage in the magazines. AND I LOVE TO BE ALL THE RAGE, even when I'm barely leaving my apartment for weeks at a time.
So I'm off to my colorist for some blonde highlights (I DESERVE IT! MAKE ME BUTTERY!) He will probably pass out from my Homeless Chic hair. And if he doesn't, he certainly will when I consult him on how to go PINK.
2) I want to go to Italy.
PROGRESS: Conversations are happening. Talks are moving forward. APRIL is the goal date.
3) I'm going to write a book.
PROGRESS: I am begging, I am pleading, my TV agent to get me a meeting with a Lit. agent in New York.
4) I'm going to lose forty pounds.
PROGRESS: I have been eating so clean and healthy, it's crazy. The fact that I got on the WW scale after Kauai and had only gained .4 pounds MADE ME INSANELY ELATED. To me, that was like LOSING FIVE POUNDS! Right now, I'm up .4 but never really considered THE BIG START until after Kauai, so I am quite excited. (CONFESSION: Need to move more. Typing doesn't count)
5) I've always wanted to run a road race. Even a five K, I don't care.
PROGRESS: The problem with having a blog is your friends read them and then they make you do stuff you said you'd do. S has us doing two road races in April. Very exciting & terrifying). I hope there is an ambulance standing by.
6) I want to redecorate my apartment.
PROGRESS: I am going to do a whole POST on this because this is MAJOR. Not major what I'm doing, please, my budget is like, a nickel. Just MAJOR, the anxiety about change and LETTING GO that it brings on.
7) I want to make something. I've narrowed it down to: POTTERY, SOME KIND OF JEWELRY MAKING OR I've always wanted to learn how to upholster furniture.
PROGRESS: I did see a class at the CC for silver smithing. THAT SOUNDS AWESOME. I gotta find that catalogue.
8) I want to volunteer.
PROGRESS: I go for my orientation on Feb. 6. I AM SO EXCITED!!!. I'm going to teach kids with cancer how to write. NOTE TO SELF: Learn how to write.
9) HAVE MORE FUN! Every day carve out time for FUN.
PROGRESS: This is tougher than you would think. How about FUN every other day? NO! Must stick with REVOLUTION/RESOLUTION!!! Must make a fun chart with pies and graphs to keep track of all the FUN I am going to have.
10) Investigate my life, figure out who I am and stop repeating patterns that are learned and that have hurt me.
PROGRESS: It's all in the journaling, Baby. This is a tough one. But no one said a Revolution was going to be easy.
11) KISS MORE BOYS.
PROGRESS: ZERO. Enough said. But I will physically attack someone and throw them down in the street and mount them if that means I can report more progress next month.
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12 comments:
thats so amazing that u actually did or attempted to start every resolution/revolution you said you would. :) amazing. NICE JOB!
Wowza! You my friend are making progress. Baby steps are starting to accumulate. It is motivating.
It's one of those things where I feel that if you can do it, I can do it too (maybe). K so I still doubt myself, a lot, but I'm working on it.
Very cool...I can attempt to help with 2. Decorating-I'm graduating from interior design school in May!
And the cancer kids-I am a cancer kid survivor (dx'd at 15, am now almost 25)...went to a peds onc and am around cancer kids all the time!
Good luck!
I want my apt redone so bad...i even contacted an HGTV show in hopes they would come over and fix my place. So far...no phone call. :( Keep up the good work!
I literally laughed out loud at the visual of anyone attacking a boy and kissing them just to keep a resolution - but hey, it's not a bad one...it's on my list too.
Do pink streaks at first, or the pink hair thing may send you into shock.
I am so with you on the lose 40lbs thing to the point I feel like I am obsessing. Great job on keeping it together in Kauai! I am avoiding the scale, but my fav jeans aren't lying...they are feeling tight still.
I am journaling for the same reason you are in #10. To figure out who the heck I am and why I keep doing what I do. I am ready for a REVOLUTION, too!
Keep writing - you give me so much inspiration knowing someone else is out there thinking about ALL these things and being HONEST about it all. Thanks so much! MUAH!
Kayla..I followed you here from self because you have a way of putting MY thoughts into YOUR words! Just another craft suggestion - make yarn. It's called spinning. It's not as boring as it sounds...it can get very artsy. I find that my yarn reflects my mood. Straight and narrow for calm days - loopy and uneven for bad days. On those days that I want to scream - I end up adding crazy stuff into the yarn like beading and sequins. Love it!
I am proud of what you have managed to accomplish! Every little step counts. I so want pink hair too. But, I don't have the balls to go PINK. You know I said to myself that I was going to get my fat ass moving in the year 2008. Laziness only accompanies chubbiness (or more sweetly referred to as fluffiness) and still, my poor treadmill had only been operated 3X. But, 3 is better than 0. So I am OK with it. Good Luck! We so want to see the pink tresses when you get them.
You better write that book! I'll have about 20 friends I want to give it to so you can inspire them, too. (Though I will brag that I am cool because I found your blog first.)
ObsessedWithLife - You are in my heart, you AWESOME SURVIVOR! I am doing this because my little cousin at 5 years old had cancer and she is now 26 - a crazy, awesome inspiration, just like you. If I get nervous about the Volunteering, I will let you know. Might need some decorating tips, too! (It's mostly the psychology of it that is taunting me!)
TryItAgain - You are so right on those PINK streaks - Britney has given a bad (CRAZY) name to the full on PINK. PS - Yes, I will be in The Crime Blotter for assaulting someone for a kiss. Look out for it!
How inspiring! Take matters into you own hands...I have so much faith in you!
I like the idea that they're revolutions instead of resolutions. Resolutions have a bad name - they're typically forgotten in 2 weeks. I've seen how many people came into the gym in the first week of January and how many are there now. It's slowly but surely emptying out. Me, I'm still there though!
I think it's important to 'name' your goals in a way that makes it achievable and exciting. I do that too!
My other advice is BABY STEPS. Perhaps instead of trying to redecorate your whole apartment, try one corner or one room? It's a big thing to let go of all the 'stuff' and memories. I'm with ya.
Good luck and well done so far!
THanks darling! Let me know!
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