Wednesday, August 3, 2011

I Am A Jack Ass

I see people reading here... they do it a lot.  And for a long time.  You know who you are, you who do not comment.  You, young lady or old lady or middle aged lady or you may not even be a lady at all and certainly, I am no lady for ever inferring you might be an old lady or no lady at all... what is wrong with me?

I am a Jack Ass.

I see you, one of you even read for 55 minutes on your Blackberry yesterday.  That's love. I think. I'm Catholic, so I am not sure about these things.  But I feel it must be love or maybe love.  Either way, I'll take it.

I mean, on a BLACKBERRY! That is a very small screen.  It must be love.

But you did not comment. Neither did the person who read for 23 minutes, 17 minutes, 47 minutes... certainly the person who had Googled "100 positions in bed" - well, I did not expect them to comment.   

But the rest of you, with the no commenting... it must be... because I am a Jack Ass.

Because I have not been writing regularly and therefore, I have squandered your love.  Is that it?  In the past, there have been many times I see tons and tons of people reading and they will not comment.  I often feel it's because a lot of the subject matter has been super personal and maybe it's hard to know what to say.

So I'm dropping in today to say, I love you guys, I love our community.  You can tell from my last post that my life is in a flux.  In the quietest places of my mind and heart, I know I need to write more.  I know I need to re-commit to the Adventures that so throughly saved me and nourished me and gave me hope and strength and pushed me on. 

I know I need you (to not think I'm a Jack Ass.) No... scratch that last part.  

I just need you.

So I wanted to say hi and I wanted to say to those of you reading, peeping, lurking, liking - to say hi back to me.  You don't even have to use your own name.  I would love to know what you like about what you've read or don't like... I'd even like you to tell me what to write in my next post.

It's my Thank You to you... you who keep reading here, the story of a girl trying to figure it all out in this mother-loving f'ing confusing crazy complex world... a girl who is trying desperately not to be a Jack Ass, to not let people down... ;) 

So... here I am. And Thank You. And I would love to know what is on your mind... 




Carolyn said...

HI! been reading your blog for years... but you haven't posted in weeks/months!! Miss reading your posts!

Anonymous said...

I enjoy your blogs immensely, because they mirror some of my own experiences in intensity, sadness, discovery and joy. I tend to post on your FB vs. your blog, but I'm here :) As far as the jackass comment....... you are no such thing. You are busy! I haven't posted on my blog in YEARS because for me, it's just a reminder of everything. I understand, we understand! As far as new topics, whatever is in your heart about learning experiences, things you look forward to...... a whole range of whatever is important to you!

Deb K OR medievalhistorybuff (if you want to look up MY blog here)

BlogLover said...

I'm a lurker (sorry!) hard to explain why. Mostly because I relate to so much of what you write and I guess I worry I will expose myself if I comment... I should just comment anon. like you said. You do inspire me a lot, I love the adventure posts but I also like the ones when you talk about your family or dating. Just keep writing, I'll always be here.

Anna said...

I read your blog religiously because I can relate to most of what you say. I don't have a good reason for why I don't comment much.

Sizzle Mac said...

I love you! you know that. Just do it (or as we say at Nike JDI)

Anonymous said...

I love your blog and you are not a jackass. I was wondering why I don't comment, I feel the same as BlogLover, but I do click on your fb with "likes"
I do your love yor blog and I do check in, I promise to comment more. xo

Love From Lise said...

To be honest, sometimes I'm just so blown away by the things you write, like you have read my journal or something, that I can't really put into words what I'm thinking. But I can't tell you how many times this blog has gotten me through a hard time. So thanks for that and I really just want you to keep writing, whatever that is.

Timothy and Jeanne Hisey said...

Admitted lurker here. :) Have a great day! J.

Jen said...

Lurkers love too!

Oftentimes, not just here, I read, write a whole comment and then reread it.

Many times when I reread it, I end up not posting, because while it seemed important and useful when I was writing, it doesn't seem like it would add much in the end.

So, you know, it's not you, it's me.

Karen said...

Sometimes I completely relate to what you write. Sometimes I don't, but I get a chance to see a new way at looking at life. Sometimes I comment, and sometimes I don't.

I look for you here, I look for you on FB. When it is quiet for longer times, I worry that things aren't going well BUT I try to tell myself that you are just busy & life happens even when a blog is not being written about it :)

It is always a pleasure to see something new here.
And each time you check in here & update, it is appreciated.

And I LOVE Jen's comment "it's not you, it's me"-so appropriate for the times we ALL have been lurkers instead of joiners ;)

Annie said...

I love your blog so much, sorry if you ever felt me not leaving a comment meant I didn't. I totally related to the person saying that sometimes they need to step away and take it all in. I find myself either laughing my butt off or feeling like the wind got knocked out of me. Either way it's because I always relate. I only wish you would write more.

Sharon said...

I tend not to comment much because I sometimes think my comments sound dumb or over-gushy and then you'd be all "yeah, okay...freak". Love you back, though!

adventure grrl said...

You guys and girls mean the world to me, I truly mean that. I'm always awed and stunned and surprised that people take the time to read what I write. Thank you so much. And thank you for being sweet and supportive. Sometimes, the lack of writing is everything piling up and sometimes being scared to come here and really let my guard down and be afraid of being a big ol' downer, LOL. I know I'm being a little all over the place but all your thoughts and comments and emails truly touch me -- truly :) xoxox Kayla

~Jai~ said...

You're not a jackass and it is good to see a post from you that lets people know you're still here.

Broken Barn Industries said...

Okay,hi! I skipped ahead to this most recent post. Now I'm going back to where I left off so I can catch up!

TK Kerouac said...

I've had your blog booked for months with many other blog favorites. Initially it was your blog banner and style of writing that attracted me.

But what brings me back from time to time is your honesty and the fact that you are a survivor of life's ups and downs and don't sugar coat anything.

So keep getting out of that bed!!!

Janey-Boo said...

I really laugh when I read your blog but mostly, I never feel alone. I know a lot of other people have said that, too, but life is hard so if I can see someone going through the same things as me, it definitely makes me feel less scared :)

Tiffany said...

I'm here too! I don't comment much on blogs these days~ But I don't know why, I guess time. I love getting comments on mine so I should share the comments in return. I will comment more often~
Happy summer!
Looking forward to more posts!
PS~how can you tell the stats on who, when, why and where they read your blog? I have wanted to know that info for a long time! :) Thanks~

Erin said...

Hi. :) I check your blog often because you write so very well and always have something inspiring to say, even at your lowest points.... and well, sometimes inspiration from an internet blog is the only thing that gets me through. I definitely have missed your writing, but I can't talk much.... I've given up blogging myself.

Maybe we can write more regularly together.

In faithful reading always,


Broken Barn Industries said...

Okay, I'm still catching up but skipped ahead again to see if you'd stopped being a jackass- apparently not- no new posts! (Just being a wise ass here.) Anyway, I posted this yesterday and thought of you when I came back here today. Might be a good motto when dealing with certain people in your life:

Jen said...

I am the lurking jackass but I think I have commented in the past.

Honestly, I could spend 100 days in bed. The thought is appealing.

I read your blog because it is sort of similiar in a round about way to mine.

Ana said...

HIII! just found this and thought i'd say hi so it would make you smile..this makes my work days so much better.. thankssssss

Willow said...

So often I wish I had as much love and as many lurkers and followers as you do here. I love that you write what is real, in your world, right then. I love that you can somehow inspire people to come back and read what you have written, that you can expose your emotions and personal problems to the world, that you can do what I'm trying to do...and you are succeeding. Keep writing, I will keep reading. :)

Angie said...

I would just like to say I love reading your blog. I haven't read it for a while but I come back every once in a while to catch up. I was think I found your blog probably a couple of years ago and I found it through a google search and I don't even remember what I was googling. All I know is every once in a while the same "point" comes across to me and it's like the lightbulb that keeps on popping on. If we know some of the things that works well in our life then why would we stop doing those things. I love the realness and humor of your blog. Keep it up :)